Navigating Wedding Season Stress-Free: A Guest’s Guide to Setting Healthy Boundaries

Wedding season is a time for joy and celebration, but it can quickly become overwhelming with a flood of invitations and commitments. To avoid saying yes to the stress, it’s crucial to set firm boundaries. Learn how to prioritize events, communicate your limits effectively, and find a balance that lets you enjoy the festivities without succumbing to stress.

Prioritizing Wedding Events

When your calendar is overflowing with wedding events, it’s essential to choose wisely which ones to attend. Consider your relationship with the couple and the location of the events. This is where you need to establish boundaries for your time, emotions, and energy.

Engagement parties can be fun, but attending every single one is unnecessary. It’s perfectly acceptable to skip them if your relationship with the couple is distant. For showers, focus on those of your closest friends and family. Sending a thoughtful gift and a note can be just as meaningful for others.

Ceremonies are often the main event, so prioritize attending those for couples you are close to. Receptions can also be significant, but if it’s not convenient or you don’t share a strong bond with the couple, it’s okay to decline. Cultural ceremonies are important too, but assess your ability to attend without feeling overwhelmed.

Managing Wedding Costs

Attending weddings can be expensive, adding stress if not managed properly. To handle this, create a detailed list of potential expenses, including shower and wedding gifts, wedding attire, travel accommodations, and pet or babysitter costs. Setting a budget early helps manage your finances and reduces stress. This planning will also guide you in deciding which events you can realistically attend, ensuring you stay within your financial limits.

Avoid saying “yes” to the stress!

Setting and Communicating Assertive Boundaries

Navigating wedding season requires setting and communicating clear boundaries, especially regarding overnight accommodations, relationships, time constraints, and responsibilities.

For instance, if you decide to stay at a hotel instead of with family for a wedding, this decision might cause some tension, but it’s necessary for your well-being.

What to Say: “For this trip, we’ve chosen to stay at a hotel to have our own space and recharge between events. We appreciate your understanding and look forward to celebrating with everyone soon.”

The “Wish Them Well” Boundary

A “wish them well” boundary allows you to gracefully disengage from guilt trips or difficult conversations.

What to Say: “It’s nice to see you; what a beautiful day or ceremony. I’m going to take my chances on the dance floor, or I’m on my way to catch up with [NAME . Enjoy the rest of your day!”

Keeping the focus on the couple helps maintain positive interactions and reminds everyone of the reason for the celebration. This can help you feel more engaged and less stressed.

Communicating Early

To manage expectations effectively, communicate your plans and limitations well in advance. Inform your hosts or the wedding party early on about your intentions to set expectations and reduce last-minute stress. This proactive approach can help you avoid unnecessary guilt trips and ensure a smoother wedding season experience.

What to Say: “Just a heads-up, here are our travel plans. Aside from the wedding day, are there any additional times or events for us to attend before we make plans on our own? We’re excited to celebrate with you.”

Wedding season should be a time of joy, not stress. By prioritizing events, managing your finances, and setting clear boundaries, you can enjoy the celebrations without feeling overwhelmed. Harness your time, emotions, and energy to fully enjoy the festivities on your terms. Create lasting memories and cherish the moments that matter most.

How To Handle Political Posts From A Colleague

We’ve all seen it. Political posts that say if you are a part of this party, then I’ll unfriend you. What? What if I don’t share your faith? Do you like me less because I’m not a mom? You get the picture. 

When so many work so hard to fight labels, when did it become okay to create labels in other lanes? 

I know that some will say, so what? Keep on scrolling. It’s not so easy. What if this is a colleague with whom you collaborate on various projects? Or what if this colleague is someone you consider a mentor? Then what happens when you label a colleague who connects to another colleague and another and another? From what I’ve seen on social media, women struggle more emotionally with these posts than men. 

So, how do you handle posts that make you anxious, sad, or stressed?

  1. Pause! I bet you thought I was going to say breathe! I feel that pausing leads us to breathe. Now inhale, exhale, and release the urge to respond. Even if your intentions are good, move on. It may look like you are setting out to prove this colleague wrong with this kind of post. When has that ever been productive? 
  2. See the BIG picture. Ask yourself the following questions. Is this the person that you know? Do you believe they think you are who they refer to in their post? How would they treat you if they ran into you on the street or at a conference? Friendly? Have you collaborated with them in the past? How was that experience for you? What impact may their posts have on future collaborations with you? With this information, you now get to decide if you will sit out a few and collaborate at another time. 
  3. Words matter. Know the risks of posting political opinions. It creates division, labels, judgment, and risks. A good colleague of mine, who was also a sponsor, once enlightened me about a little thing called optics. Optics are risks. What’s the risk with political posts? Losing existing or new clients, sponsors, and colleagues, you collaborate on projects with friends and family. 
  4. Set healthy boundaries for your energy. Seeing judgemental posts give off a bad vibe, and for many women, it can wreck your morning! Don’t match that energy! Stay focused, and harness your exuberance! 

That liveliness introduces you to your next comment, client call, zoom meeting, email, etc. Think of it as a part of your image! 

Your energy is your most significant currency, so spend it wisely! 

Take What You Learn & Make A Difference With It

Anastasia